In my mind, I have lost her already That’s why I can love her with abandon and devotion What I want is to give her everything a hopeless pursuit when my body fails to meet the specifications or the dress code I wouldn’t hold it against her if she were to say it’s just too hard because it is I crave sameness, solidarity against all odds a thing of romance fuelled by adversity but I cannot presume to know what it is for her how it feels to be hand in hand with me in a sea of scrutinizing eyes profane profanities arbitrary insanity I will follow her eyes, her veins, her mind to beginnings and endings because it is a thing of mystery this conviction of the heart I love her because that is what I am it pulsates through my fingers and my eyes let it burn warm liquor on a cold throat cold hands under a mound of blankets mouths over mouths circles of desire love is the practice